Dear Dr. Love,
I’m 26 weeks pregnant and my boyfriend wants me to marry him, but I feel that there are so many things that haven’t been acknowledged between us, yet. The big one is his libido, which is very. . . mild. I, on the other hand, have what I would call a voracious appetite, and it gets very frustrating for me.
Often times, I will approach him and allude to or outright tell him that I want him, and he has some excuse for not having sex. I wonder if he doesn’t find me attractive, or if I don’t do the right things. I am willing to jump through sexual hoops to turn him on ( which has gotten difficult for me in the past month), get him therapy, probing him for what gets him hot. . . and he’s always so vague. ‘I don’t know. ‘ is the answer to any question I ask him about what he likes. Or worse, ‘I don’t mind it. ‘
Obviously, he seems uncomfortable with sex, and he gets very defensive if I bring it up. . . even if I’m talking about what I like. He makes me feel dirty when I describe what turns me on. I’ve never had this problem with anyone before. Every man I’ve been with enjoyed my sexual appetite. I feel shallow and petty for complaining about it, but it’s an important part of our relationship, and I feel like it’s not being acknowledged. Help! I want to resolve this before I commit to marriage!