There is a girl at work and we knew each other for months but never talked. I never talk to anyone cause of my anxiety. I only ask people for help when I have to. Everything was fine. I always thought she was kinda cool and cute but I knew that I have anxiety so I never bothered talking to her.

One day I asked her for help but kinda anxious looking in her eyes and I think it bothered her so I did. And that day I had to ask her for help many times and she always was happy about it, while usually people kinda emotionless with me. That day she was very nice and was doing funny things and even called me bestie.

We never spend that much time together and next days I kinda wanted to interact with her more. I’ve never had a person so nice to me. And she is super positive and super cool. I have social anxiety so I have difficulty just talking to her and she never talks to me either while she is not helping me.

I’ve made an cartoon drawing of her and for weeks was anxious to show her. I felt it was kinda weird of me to do because we weren’t that close after all. I was ruminating about this for weeks literally making me overly anxious to be around her and one day I just showed her and she liked it. She said that she was glad I did and I shouldn’t have been shy about it.

The next days became extremely awkward for me because we still weren’t talking and I thought she as a social one would just talk to me. She did look at me a lot since then and I kinda felt very uncomfortable making eye contact and since then I couldn’t be around her, though she didn’t do anything wrong. I was feeling very awkward every time around her feeling I have to say something but it was weeks since I showed her the art and we never spoke since, and I had no reason to ask her for help and was very anxious to talk to her. She started paying me more attention which made me awkward.

One day I had to ask her for help and she was usual super positive self and she even sorta curtsy bowed me. Which was very sweet. I kinda thought she didn’t find my awkwardness any weird after all.

But I’m still hella anxious around her. We never talk, ever. We often have weird eye contact and I even avoid her sometimes. But when I ask for her help she is ultra positive and curtsying with me.

I kinda do like her as a girl but I feel like she is better as friend but any way I can’t talk yo her cause I’m anxious and sometimes I feel like she really wants me to talk to her but I always super anxious and awkward around her.

Sometimes I think she is just nice person and doesn’t think anything of me. Cause she literally never tried to talk to me she always reacts to me in a super positive and nice way. She often talks to other coworkers while I’m super anxious to talk to anyone and one more thing she is too positive so sometimes I think she is just acting nice cause she wants positive work environment. I kinda feel like she will like everything I would do but I would never know if she actually likes it.

I think I am overthinking too much and I should just talk to her but I think she sees how awkward I am and I feel not confident about talking to her. To clarify she never was not positive and nice to me while we were actually talking but we can just spend a week never talking and never even smiling or say hi. But when I ask her for help she is super nice.

What should I do?

Dr Jamie Turndorf Answered question September 22, 2022