I really hope that you can help me. My last long term relationship ended 4 years ago. We were together for 7 years. The problem I have is finding someone that I’m attracted to who is also attracted to me and not sabotaging the relationship.For the past year or so I have been going out socially 3 or 4 nights each week and as of today I realized that my drinking is causing me to act very irresponsibly to the point of totally ruining any hopes of a loving relationship. Last night, after a wonderful date, I ended up kissing a mutual friend right in front of my date.I never thought I would hit such a low in my morals but it happened. What was meant to be an innocent peck goodbye turned not so innocent. I drink soda usually once a week but when I drink alchohol my inhibitions hit the cellar.I am a very lonely woman and I feel so desperate at times. With this new found realization I’ve decided not to socialize so often. . . maybe even only once or twice a month because I just don’t trust myself anymore. I’ve dated several men at a time, which I hate doing, but I feel so alone.When one man can’t spend an evening with me, I call another. Some of them know each other also, and I feel it’s only a matter of time before they compare notes.I’m going to take some time off from dating also for awhile and see if I can regroup and feel good about myself again. Since my social life isn’t going to be as it’s been maybe you can suggest other ways for me to meet that special someone and maybe with not drinking I won’t sabotage a good thing.I also need to find something else to occupy my free time. I’m afraid that I will fall into a deep drepression because of the loneliness that I feel and with not going out as much I’m afraid that the loneliness is only going to get worse.Money is an issue too. . . usually when I go out, I shoot pool for free and men friends buy my drinks. I searched ‘sabotage’ in your archives and it came back with no result.Please help me, Dr. Love. I’m about ready to go out of my mind.