i have a boyfriend for 7 months but still my parents and family doesnt know it. it is because they still dont want me to have a boyfriend, not even after i turn 18, but when i finished college!i hate it, because i know i can handle it. my boyfriend was the serios one that i guess would be the one i’ll be with for the rest of my life, he commits the same too. . . its so hard to have a relationship without your parents knowing it, me and my boyfriend’s relationship is legal to his parents, it was just i who’s not. . . im feeling as if im unfair to him. . . but he says he understands. . . were actually sexually active.he respects me. . . but what should i do. . . i hate how my parents treat me. . . he used to accompany me at house when i was sick, but my grandma seems to smell something like its us and told my mother about it, my grandma is so angry!my mom just told me that and she understands. she trusts me but still she doesnt know about me and my boyfriend. my parents like him as my suitor, thats what they know. . .
You really are in a bind. Your parents are so strict that you feel forced to lie to them. The only thing I can suggest is having a heart to heart talk in which you get them to tell you exactly what thoughts and feelings underlie their rule.Don’t try to change their mind. Listen, take mental notes, and then thank them for sharing. Soon have another, even more open discussion in which they reveal more of their concerns. When you are clear on their concerns, you will be in a better position to respond to them.If, for example, they say that they are afraid you will become pregnant, you will know what to say. If, they are afraid, that you won’t pursue your own education if you become involved too young, again you’ll know what to say.In the end, your parents can’t stop you from making your own choices. You are a separate person and they need to allow you to grow. You will need to say this to them when the time is right and help them to see that you need to make your own decisions and mistakes, and that they can’t shield you from life.If you need me to help you, I would be happy to do a phone consultation with you and your parents.