Dear Dr. Love, I have been married for 10 years to a man who is 7 yrs my junior. (I am 40.) When we met, he had just received his bachelors degree in English and expressed ambitions about law school or perhaps getting his master’s in English and teaching at the university level.However, none of this has materialized. He is still working in a low-paying (under 20, 000/year) job. I make twice his salary and it seems I end up paying for all his sports equipment, clothes, music, cigars, etc.We recently (last June) bought a house and are barely making ends meet. I also make extra money by selling things on eBay, but all he does is spend it as fast as I can make it. Also, he has been fired from 2 previous jobs and has gained 75 pounds since we met.I have tried to encourage him (gently – he’s very sensitive and takes the slightest comment as an attack) to get a better job, take some classes, and get in shape, and he seems interested at first but then nothing happens. Or he wants me to do the job search for him or blames my cooking for making him fat.I feel more like his mother than his wife. I have developed a lot of resentment and this has affected my libido. I have met someone on the internet who wants me to leave my husband and move to Europe to be his mistress.He’s my age, kind, romantic, and a very successfull business man. We are extremely compatible and I’m actually considering his offer. But my husband could barely support himself on his income alone, and I would feel guilty if I abandoned him.I have asked him to get counseling but he doesn’t want to share our problems with an outsider.What should I do? Thank you.