Help, I am 24 years old and have been married to my wife for over 4 years now, but have been separated for almost 5 months now. I have always been very much in love with this woman, but I became addicted to the intenet ( certain games) and would spend almost 7-8 hours a day glued to the monitor while my wife found other things to do.We spent less and less time together, and finally she announced (back in July) that she was leaving and moving to California with her sister and our daughter to pursue her dream of working there. We agreed to pursue our own lives as individuals (have not divorced yet for some practical reasons that would be too lengthy to explain here) and she has found a boyfriend (they have not yet slept together) and I found a relationship as well.We have been seeing each other for almost 3 months, and she really does have everything. She is beautiful, sensitive, affectionate, even rich. If I ever found another woman to be with, it would be her, and now I’m realizing how much I want my wife back.I’ve explained my feelings to her, and have told her I’m breaking it off with my girlfriend because the one soulmate I’ve found was her (my wife). She says even if it is all true and I have grown up, she honestly doesn’t know if it can be back to the way it was. She still has feelings, but whether they can be fully reignited is very questionable, and although she hasn’t progressed far, she IS with a boyfriend, and she does care a lot about him (though she isn’t ‘in love’quite yet).I will give up everything I own to get her back if I knew it would work. I screwed up but have been away from her for almost 5 months, and have become a man in the ways I’ve needed to. Housecleaning, cooking, all those things are normal to me now, when I would never do them before she left.I would be eternally grateful for ANY advice on what I could do to get her back so see can she that I am now the man I’ve always wanted to be for her.Thanks for your time
All you can do at this point is to own that you screwed up and ask for a second chance.See my Archives on this subject, because I know that I have answered other questions like this that will be helpful to you. Keep in mind that she will be unwilling to trust you because of past hurts. So, tell her that you aren’t asking her to tear down her wall of mistrust. You only want her to sit back and watch you prove yourself over time.And, once she sees that you have really changed for good, then she can decide whether she wants to trust you or not. You are not asking for a commitment or a promise that she will get back with you. You just want a second chance. That’s all you can do at this point.I hope that she is willing to try again, for your sake.
