My girlfriend and I have been together for quite a while and have been discussing our future together after graduating from college–in the spring of 2001.We have so many things in common and she is the only woman I’ve truly cared about–I took the compatability test and got in the 90th percentile.Anyway, she wants kids (I don’t) and she wants to live in the town she was brought up in (in Maine) and I want to live in Europe. Should we stay together until the day she sees me off at the airport or should we break it offShe has given me the ultimatum and will not come with me to Europe, nor is she willing to compromise–resentments would build. Any adviceThanks!
While you two are compatible in many areas, the areas in which you aren’t compatible are serious enough to stall this relationship permanently. Some areas of difference are more important that others.For example, if a couple doesn’t share the same political philosophies, no big deal. But if you can’t agree on whether to have children or not, or where to live, then you have differences that cut to the core of the relationship.What’s more, yours are not negotiable issues. If you say that you are fixed on not having children, then that ‘s a done deal. You don’t sound open on that point whatsoever. You aren’t saying I may change my mind later, so basically that area of incompatibility will never change.And, there is no way that this issue will not erode your relationship. Add to that that you don’t agree on where you want to settle, and I’m afraid that inspite of your compatibility in other areas, there are too many important issues on which you both are basically at odds.It doesn’t sound like this relationship can work. I am sorry.