I have a dilemma. My bf of 3 yrs. has a ” sister ” (not blood related ) who has been a round for yrs. Back story : first he’s a diabetic, the mother of his 2 girls is no longer in the picture hasn’t been for some years now. Well in the beginning his so called sister would help him with the girls. Oh yes did I mention we live at his parents house. So this sister of his has been an issue for us since the beginning of our relationship. She does not respect boundaries. His parents know that I am uncomfortable with her coming over as much as she does. I could be at work, the grocery store, she comes over, parents already heard us arguing about her , and they still let her in. His mother and father will let her in and then I hear her voice from down the hallway. I have expressed in so many ways that I don’t want her here as much as she comes by. I Don’t like it. once she arrives I make up some reason to leave to the store again or a friend’s house. I know I’m an idiot for that, but he sees it coming from me. I start gathering my purse, phone. He knows I’m about to take off, not once has he got up to stop me. He knows that when she leaves I’ll be back. An argument will occur . I am  some what of a doormat. I’ve already expressed to her as well that it bothers me that she comes over. I will not make him choose. Since the obvious decision is already made. What am I doing wrong ? Am I out of Line? I an very understanding but from an outside view if any of my friends was going through this I would have already told them , HE DOESN’T RESPECT THE RELATIONSHIP OR YOUR FEELINGS . YOU HAVE TO MOVE ON . What should I do? Am I asking too much of him to choose?

Dr Jamie Turndorf Answered question October 12, 2022