I am very confused. This guy I know has many moods. When I first met him he was nice and he flirted with me all the time. We also spent a lot of time together. Now I have no idea who he is. He will be nice to me one minute and then the next time I see him he is a total ass.EXAMPLE: he asked me how my day was and then he told me about what he was going to do that night, normal right? Then I just saw him today and oh my god, what an ass. He made fun of me.I sometimes feel that he is trying to compete with me. He also changes his mind all the time. I guess what my question is: Why would he want to be my friend one minute and then change his mind. Either he does or he does not. Why don’t he just tell me to back off if he did not want to be my friend?I sometimes feel that I am wasting my time with him. He did at one point in time tell me that he was hanging out with this girl. It seems that after he met her he started to go crazy while he was hanging with her, the things that he once loved, he now hates. He also told me that she moved away. I don’t think he went crazy because she moved away, he was going crazy while he was with her.I thought that if you met someone you love and care about, it brought the best out in you. Does it?I just want to thank you for your time. I LOVE YOUR WEB SITE! ! ! !
You are right, love should bring out the best in you. This guy doesn’t know which end is up. His moods fluctuate from day to day and as his mood shifts, so does his feeling about the world around him, including the people in his life.It sounds like he has a mood disorder. Don’t try to make sense of his behavior. He doesn’t have a clue, so how can you.You asked me a lot of questions about him, but you didn’t ask the most important question of all, which is why do you want to be friends with someone who treats you so inconsistently and hurtfully. Your answer is surely to be found in your childhood.I would bet that you were raised by a parent who was moody and inconsistent, just like him. This type of childhood experience programs you to seek out people who will continue treating you in the way you are familiar.You need to reprogram your mind so that you come to expect loving and consistent treatment. This reprogramming can happen in a number of ways: you can begin individual, or better yet, group therapy and experience new and loving relationships that become a model for all other relationships.You can do hypnosis; and/or you can do inner child healing (see Bradshaw’s books) in which you re-parent yourself. It doesn’t matter how you get there, just get to the place where you know that you are not to be surrounded by people or situations that do you harm.