Dear Dr. Love,I’m in a wonderful relationship with a caring, thoughtful and trustworthy man. He treats me very well and I can tell he loves me as much as he says he does. He is helpful, reliable and willing to put up with my busy life. The problem is me. Several years ago, while I was busy pursuing my master’s degree and raising twin toddlers, my ‘reliable, dependable, corporate executive’ husband left our family for a woman he met in an exotic dance bar. She was an attractive woman in a plastic sort of way, but very unstable due to heavy involvement in drugs and alcohol. Honestly, I can’t believe my husband would fall for such a person, but their roller coaster relationship lasted throughout our stormy divorce and may still continue today. I won sole custody of our then six year old daughters and he skipped state to avoid child support. We are no longer in contact.Although I am thankful to have’dodged that bullet, ‘ I find it very difficult to trust the wonderful man I am now with. It’s ridiculous for me to be this way. His first marriage ended due to infidelity (hers) and he was faithful to her even after he found our she wasn’t. (This I’ve heard from many different sources. )I’m attractive, well spoken, intelligent and have a very successful career. My boyfriend constantly reminds me of these things. But I’m suspicious over everything! After he attended conferences at his kids’ school, I was dying to know what their teachers looked like. One night he stopped off for a beer with a friend. When I found out they had gone to Hooters, I cried until I fell asleep. Most of the time I am able to keep my jealous feelings from my boyfriend. I don’t want him to know I am so insecure, because I know he is attracted to my independence and (faked) self confidence. He would be turned off if he knew how I really was.The problem is, the longer we’re together, the worse my jealousy gets and the worse I am at hiding it. Shouldn’t the opposite be true? I was never like this before, believe me. I need to know what to do to gain some confidence in our relationship before I drive this great guy away. He wants us to move in together. We’ve been in this relationship for almost three years. I don’t want to take the next step until I get myself together, otherwise, I am sure to lose him. Any thoughts?Can’t Seem to Trust